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How to make people like you especially when they don’t like you

Sometimes people don’t like you and you don’t even have to make an extra effort. May be you started on a wrong footing, you made a comment that pissed off someone permanently or you are in a position where that person should have been. Whatever is the reason, that person dislikes you and you want him or her to like you. Maybe that person is at your workplace. Maybe he or she is in your class or he or she might also be in your family. It’s not a conducive environment to work in, or live in, if there is someone, or if there are people who don’t like you.

We’re not talking about bullies and we’re not talking about people who generally have a negative attitude – these people anyway dislike others and they need psychiatric help. In this article we’re talking about normal people who don’t like you due to some misunderstanding or some misconception or some preconceived notion. You actually want these people, or this person, to like you.

Again, wanting to make people like you shouldn’t turn into an obsession. You can be nice to them, you can be pleasant to them, you can even do favors to them, eventually it depends on them whether they like you are not. If nothing changes their feelings for you, the best option for you is to move on and learn to live with the reality.

This article in Forbes lists a couple of things you can do to make people like you in case they dislike you. You may not agree with them if you think making you vulnerable to rejection isn’t worth it.

  • Give genuine compliments: You should really mean them. Every person has something good in him or her, we just have to look for it. Does that person sing well? Does he or she have beautiful handwriting? Does he or she have great marketing skills or knows how to persuade people? You can also try to find out his or her positive sides from close friends and colleagues without making it obvious. Keep it natural because if you are forcing yourself to say something, it shows on your face and your voice doesn’t sound as friendly as it should.
  • Ask for their advice: When you ask for advice, it shows that you trust that person’s wisdom. When you seek advice you accept that that person knows something that you don’t. It also shows that you actually like that person and appreciate his or her counsel.

Aside from these things you may also directly like to ask the person why he or she dislikes you. It may put both of you in an awkward position but if you clearly explain that you don’t like the current status quo and you would like to change it if it can be helped, the situation can be improved to a great extent.